I don't know

There is something that is just so satisfying about just not knowing sometimes.

This thought came as a shock to me today because I am the queen of NEEDING TO KNOW!! I like to be in control. I like to plan out my day. I make lists of lists to make. Seriously. (I also add things to a list that weren't previously on it but have since completed during my day just to make myself feel like I have accomplished more. That's a whole 'nother issue...). I have a love/hate relationship with texting. (Love it cause people can be tracked down and therefore I get to know what they are doing. Hate it because of said reason and also when I don't get a prompt answer.) I could go on but I'm pretty sure you probably catch my drift! (Can you say lighten up much?!)

It probably doesn't surprise you to hear that I'm also not very patient. So when I get an idea, I just want to go with it. Correction: I NEED to go with it.

God has been revealing Himself to me so much in this last year. You know that verse, "Draw near to God and He will draw near to you"? So true! As I've drawn nearer to the Lord, He has revealed Himself to me in ways that I was not expecting. And that I still don't expect. I don't know about you but I have had a very narrow view of who God is and how He is supposed to act. I think He is probably purposely acting out of those ways just so my mind can be driven crazy STRETCHED!

I have had so many ideas and things I have been wanting to do for some time now. (And they are good, God ideas! Nothing wrong with them at all!) Most of them I have just gone ahead with without really seeking the Lord's direction. And they have all flopped. I ended up with nothing but frustration.

But there have been a few that I have done nothing about yet. Except pray. Probably due to fear that it would fail. But now I pray because I know that the answer isn't necessarily "No, it won't work", but "No, it's not time yet". This is what I mean about not knowing. I don't have to live my days in frustration that I can't do anything. God is shaping me to carry out His will here on earth and right now that just means "It's not time yet". The satisfaction comes from knowing that He is guiding me. Day by day. Step by step. Moment by moment. If I will just lay down my need to control and instead give it to Him to guide me, He will be faithful. God knows the desires of my heart. Today I am trusting Him with those desires. And I am thankful that He loves me and cares and wants to fulfill those desires in accordance with His good purposes for my life.

I hope this little thought acts as a bit of encouragement for those of you that are just waiting for an answer. Don't give up. Keep drawing nearer to God. Your answer will come.

Be blessed today!

Leah

Feeling a little Green

I have been trying to adopt a cleaner lifestyle for myself and my family over the last several months. The Lord has really impressed upon me about how our bodies are His temple. This has led me in a variety of directions including weight loss and healthy eating and living. Let me tell you...it is not as easy as I hoped it would be!

There are so many things that I am realizing we need to rethink and retrain ourselves in. It's really not as simple as just buying organic foods! (For those of you that have been living clean and green for some time - please humor me as I learn! Tips are also more than welcome!) The more I read and the more knowledge I gain, the more I realize just how many toxins we put into our bodies (both on purpose and inadvertantly). And some of the articles I have read are downright terrifying!

It is also overwhelming. Where do I even begin?

Part of me wants to abandon life as we know it, move out into the bush somewhere and live like the Wilder's on Little House on the Prairie. You know where Hubs (aka Pa) goes out and hunts for all our meals and builds everything from scratch, I (aka Ma) bake and sew and churn butter in the kitchen by the woodstove, and the kids all help out with everything and only have one toy to play with. And those toys are a ragdoll for the girl and a genuine pigskin football for the boys (no bpa/lead/toxic worries there, right?!).

And then the other part of me just loves the tv and internet and the pure convenience of everyday modern life. (Hello flushing toilets and running water!)

So I have kind of gone back and forth in my quest for green-clean because I just don't know where to begin. And you know what? I just don't know if it is truly possible to completely "convert" overnight.

So here is what I am going to do: I am going to commit to just one change a month. For now anyways. Once I get the hang of things and start remembering all this newfound knowledge I have then I will ramp that up a bit but this is where I'm at now.

So far already I have pretty well cut out all foods that I cannot pronounce (except for a few cans of Alphagetti's...lunch tomorrow!). I will continue on with this as I spring clean the fridge and pantry.

My next challenge is getting rid of the toxic cosmetic/beauty products that we use on a daily basis. This is a big one for me and will take a bit of time because of our location and the inability to replace some of these items with natural products. But stay tuned for how it's going and some recipes that I've spotted that I really want to try out.

I'm scared/excited right now!

Thanks for reading :)
(And please excuse the hurriedness of this writing...I'm sure it shows! It's the end of the day and I can hear the kiddo's out of bed and into mischief...)

Set Your Mind

I just got back from the gym. And let me just say, the class I took today TOTALLY kicked my butt!

And I kind of liked it! (Kind of because I could hardly walk down the stairs to leave the gym after but liked it because it really was a great workout!)

Anyways, this all ties into this week's No Complaining post. I'll rewind.

My dear, sweet husband offered for me to take 4 days (by myself!!) to head to the "big city" just to unwind, regroup, and simply just be by myself. I was hesitant at first because first of all we just got back from Mexico two weeks ago! Did I really need another "vacation"? I told myself yes, yes I did because Mexico wasn't really a vacation for me since we were all in the same room for an entire two weeks. There was no hiding or quiet times. Just togetherness. Now I love my family but EVERYBODY needs some time by themselves!

Second of all, this is our No Spend Year! Which means we do not have an extra jar for "Leah's Mental Health/Sanity/Vacation"! But he assured me that it was fine. So why question, right?

Lastly, (sigh) the offer came after a near meltdown from me that I just couldn't handle life at that moment. Yes, folks, I complained. HOWEVER!!! I immediately found a quiet space by myself and poured my heart out to God. I asked forgiveness for complaining so quickly and asked for Him to renew me and refresh me and guide me. And you know what? He totally did! (Why am I always amazed at answered prayer?) I felt better and rejoined life. It was later after all that that hubster offered the little vacay for me. He is truly a wonderful man. :)

So I've been living it up the last four days here in the city. I have gone shopping (just a little fyi for those of you still using film in cameras - STOP!! The prices have gone up ridiculously high - $40 for 3 disposable cameras!!), I have watched TV, I have read books, I took a day to fast and pray, I've gone to anti-gravity yoga (you know those people that do acrobatics on those long cloths? Yeah, kind of like that...except a little less intense) and, like I started out with, I ended with the butt-kicking aerobics class today. It has been a fantastic week so really not much to complain about or even think about complaining!

Here is my challenge this week:

"Set your minds on things above, not on earthly things." Colossians 3:2

This week I am not just going to avoid thinking negative, whiny, complain-y things. I am going to actually dwell on the things above. Things like Jesus and what He did for me on the cross. I am going to search out specific verses and meditate on them. (I am really good at reading the bible. I am not so good on the thinking on what I just read.) I am going to transform my mind.

"Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God's will is - His good, pleasing and perfect will." Romans 12:2

Let me know if you'd like to join me in this challenge and I will post daily scriptures that we can meditate on and share our thoughts.

I am going to pack up and get ready to head home right away. And I am so ready to go!

If I can walk out of here.

(This post seriously took me about half an hour to type my arms are so sore! Ha ha!)

Thanks for reading!

Quit Complaining!

Well I am officially about 3 weeks into this no complaining challenge. And it is not really going so well.

I think I am improving with not vocalizing my thoughts so much but right now I am faced with just that - my thoughts.

"We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ." -2 Corinthians 10:5

Do you think Jesus whined and complained about His tasks here on earth?

"God, really, I am so tired of walking everywhere."

"Why don't these people get it? They just don't understand."

"But I don't want to wash their smelly, dirty feet."

"But I don't want to die."

"Is it really even worth it?"

We probably would not be where we are if Jesus had spent, no, wasted His time complaining like that.

I may not be vocalizing my dissatisfaction as much as before but my thoughts are definitely making themselves known. For hours, sometimes ruining entire days.

Example time!

We just got back from an incredible (almost free!) trip to Mexico and for those of you with kids you probably understand what this week looks like for us. Basically it involves retraining your children to the way the were before they spent two weeks routine-free at a hotel with a buffet! (They just don't seem to understand why they have to eat what I make them to eat!) We also all slept in one room while there. So, again, why can't we all just sleep in one room at home? (That sentence was dripping with sarcasm.)

Needless to say this week has been a sleep deprived, long one. And my thoughts have ranged from "Grr! Why don't they just get it?!" to "I just need some time by myself. I never get any time by myself."

I am thankful for my children again this week. Thankful that they give me the opportunity to grow as a mother and as a person. I don't think there is any other position I could be in that could allow such trying times and such growth at the same time. (I am sure there are. But I definitely cannot think of any right now!) God is using them to shape me into the person He wants me to be. For that, I am thankful.

I am thankful that I am not alone. There are so many people in this world that have nobody day in and day out. And yes while quiet times alone are good and I would say necessary for growth (and sanity...), being alone all the time is definitely not good.

I am writing this post very quickly and in between (surprise, surprise) more discipline! So please forgive the hurriedness and probably many grammatical errors :)

I hope you have a happy Friday and weekend everybody! We are on Spring Break next week here. Should be interesting!

Ha ha! Kidding! I am very much looking forward to a relaxed week at home.

Have a fantastic weekend!

The Complaining Challenge

I am a complainer. No excuses. No way around it (no matter how hard I try to think of a way).  When things don't go exactly the way I want, I make it known through my words.

"Do everything without complaining or arguing," -Philippians 2:14

Ouch. How often to I do anything without complaining or arguing? Especially with my family. They are the ones I should be loving the most here on this earth yet they are the ones that get the brunt of my bad attitude day after day.

I love being a stay at home mom but how many times a day do I find myself complaining about the mess, the cleaning, the fighting, the cooking, etc? You would think I didn't want to be here the way I go on!

I was reading about Mandy's challenge she proposed to herself over at Biblical Homemaking and knew this was something I not only wanted but needed to do.

So, introducing Thankful Thursday's!

Every Thursday I will be listing 5 different things I am thankful for that week and I will be posting them around my house to remind me everyday that I have nothing to complain about.

1. My beautiful, healthy family. I have always been so thankful to the Lord for the health He has blessed us with. This is something I will definitely be including regularly in my praise this week. (I love this picture! It is at the end of a long Christmas day and I think everybody's faces display that quite well! I think we qualify for awkward family photos for sure! :P)

2. My Bible. First and foremost I am thankful for my bible because it is the Word of God. The riches contained within these pages are so great that nobody will ever know all there is to know. There is always more to learn and grow in relationship with our Lord and Savior. Secondly, I am thankful for the freedom to own a bible without fear of persecution. The kids have been learning about different countries in their Sunday School class and how so many of them risk death just for proclaiming they are a Christian, let alone owning a bible! This has just helped me to see just how great of a treasure this book truly is. (And as you can see Ephesians is probably one of my favorite books!)

3. Food. We have never had to know what it truly means to be starving. God has always provided us with more than enough. And although I think that we could definitely use a lesson around here in being a little more thankful for the food we are given (I'm talking to you picky eaters of the house, a.k.a. children :) we never need to worry about going hungry. In fact, we could stand to be more generous with what we have by hosting meals here or by blessing another family with a meal. (Hmm stay tuned...)

4. Ahh sunsets. Some of you may think this is silly but I think God  paints these beautiful pictures in the sky just for me. There is nothing quite like a prairie sunset where you can watch it fall completely over the horizon with nothing blocking your view. You just watch and watch until there is just a sliver of sun left and then it is just gone. Breathtaking. But I have come to discover that around here, although you can't watch it completely disappear with the different landscape, there is still a beauty about it when you watch all the colors reflecting on the lake. Gorgeous.

5. And finally, this man right here. (You don't have to tell me how handsome he looks in his hunter orange duds!) This man treats me like royalty. He provides for our family in so many ways and is such a loving husband and father. He encourages me daily and loves me through all the complaining. This relationship has truly revealed the worst parts of me and has shown me just how much I need the grace of our Savior. (By no fault of his own! This is in a good, God-revealing way! Ha ha oh dear I could get in trouble for this so I sure hope you understand what I'm trying to say here!) He makes me want to be a better woman! (Phew...good save?!)

I know this sounds like it is such a simple thing for many of you but this is really life-changing for me! Please pray for me as I learn to control my tongue this week (and from now on!) and change the attitude of my heart.

What are you thankful for? Please share...I love comments!

Have a great week!

Beer for Breakfast

Kind of makes you shudder a little, doesn't it? But you did read correctly. Today's final post on cooking with beer does indeed feature a breakfast recipe.

Bud-cakes.

Yup. That would be pancakes made with beer. But don't leave yet! These were the fluffiest, moist-est (???), most delicious pancakes I have ever made before. Seriously.

The recipe: (Adapted from this recipe.)

3 1/2 cups flour
3 tsp baking powder
1 tsp salt
2 1/2 tbsp sugar
3 eggs
1 can Alexander Keith's beer (I think any light beer would be fine)
2 - 2 1/2 cups milk (enough to make the batter a little bit thin)*
1/2 cup melted butter

*I found that a bit extra milk was necessary to counteract the beer. If there isn't enough there might still be that slight beer taste to the pancakes (never good...unless you like that...then don't add extra!).

Mix together flour, baking powder, salt and sugar.

Mix eggs, beer, milk and butter together. Add to dry ingredients and beat until smooth.

Drop batter by spoonfuls onto a hot, (greased if not a non-stick) griddle. Turn when batter rises and entire surface is dotted with holes.

Makes 18 - 24 pancakes, depending on size.

                               See how thick and fluffy these are?!

                               Seriously, at least an inch thick!

So good. I forgot to count exactly how many we got but as you can tell it was at least a plate full. Definitely enough to feed our family of five (with three little kids that can pack away at least 3 or 4 pancakes til we cut them off!)

Let me know if you give these a try and what you think of them.

Have a nice weekend everybody!

Beer for...dessert?!

Yup. You read that title correctly.

Today's featured beer recipe is a dessert.

And it is absolutely delicious!

I am talking about Beer Apple Fritters. Or Apple Beer Fritters. Or Apple Fritters with Beer. (I don't know how it sounds best because honestly, beer just doesn't seem to fit any place you put it!)
Sidenote: Check out last week's post to get the scoop as to why I am so obsessed with cooking with beer :P

I think I should just get on with the recipe rather than continuing on with my ramblings about beer...

Beer Apple Fritters (Click here for the original recipe)

12 ounces amber ale (I used Alexander Keith's and I think it turned out just fine)
1 1/2 cups white all purpose flour
2 tbsp sugar
1 tsp vanilla
2 tbsp melted butter
1/4 cup peanut oil*
1/4 cup grapeseed oil*
2 cups canola oil
8 large apples**, peeled, cored, and cut into 1/3" thick rings
Icing sugar and ground cinnamon

*I used 2 1/2 cups of Sunflower oil instead and it worked just fine. 
**I cut up my apples into small pieces before reading this part of the recipe so I just mixed them into the batter instead like a real fritter is. Again, this worked just fine. I will print the recipe for the original way but just know you can do it this way also!


1. In a large bowl, whisk together ale, flour, sugar, vanilla, and melted butter. Set aside. Prepare apples.
2. Blend the oils and fill pan or deep fryer to a depth of 2 inches. Heat to 360ºF or over medium-high heat.
3. Blot apple rings on a paper towel, then dip in batter to coat evenly. (Or blot then mix into batter.) Dip and fry in small batches, turning once to cook evenly. I found about a 1/3 cup of batter made a decent size donut if you are doing it my way. Skim the oil of any pieces of batter that fall off during cooking and add more as necessary, maintaining a 350º temperature.
4. Remove fritters from oil and drain for a few minutes on a platter lined with paper towel. Dust with cinnamon and icing sugar and serve warm.

Sounds so good, right?

The only thing I found is that the temperature of the oil is important. If it is too high, the outside will look brown and ready but the inside isn't quite cooked all the way. We found this out the hard way, folks. And then it really does taste like beer. And that is no good in an apple fritter. But if they are cooked properly then they just taste like good, deep-fryed, donut shop deliciousness!

So be patient and cook longer at a lower temperature!

Finally, a picture:

I'm not even going to tell you how long these lasted in our house.



It definitely was longer than 2 hours.



Alright, it was a day. Maybe a day and a half.



But, come on, there's five of us here!

Ok, I know. Excuses, excuses! Maybe we should have invited some friends over to partake in the goodness with us...

Let me know if you give these a try! (And if you have more self-control than we did :P)

Next up....beer for breakfast. Ha ha ha it just gets better!

Have a great day!